Kiertää kuin kissa kuumaa puuroa

is Finnish and means more or less “to circle like a cat circles hot porridge”. In Swedish it’s the same “gå som katten kring het gröt”. In Enligsh you would probably say “beat around the bush”. This is a great idiom, because it in many ways explains what the Finns are alike.

We usually don’t circle like a cat circles hot porridge. (Which we do eat a lot in Finland. The porridge I mean. Not cats. That would be wrong!!! lol) If we have something to say we say it. Upfront and without sugarcoating it. So for you Texans, this can come out as strange, since the American way is to always be polite and considerate. And don’t get me wrong – so are we Finns. We just don’t want to waste a lot of time, when we can give an answer in 2 seconds instead of 2 minutes. I’ve even had conversations with my own husband (when we still did the messenger calls because of long-distance), in which he thought that I was offending him. He realized at some point that it was due to cultural differences. 😆 Now, that we’ve been married for 3 years (wow, time flies), he still sometimes has issues with my non-sugarcoating side, when he is asking a question (expecting a conversation) and my answer consists of one simple word. Here’s an example of what one of those “conversations ” can look like:

Him: Hey, there’s this awesome new movie out. Do you wan to go and see it tonight at 10pm?

Me: No. (It’s not that I don’t like the movies or the movie, it might be coming very sudden, last minute babysitting issues, I’m probably alreay tired, yada yada yada)

Him: It’s really interesting, I think you would like it! Yes?

Me: No.

Him: Are you sure you don’t want to go?

Me: Yes. (Saying ‘no’ here would mean I wouldn’t be sure.)

Him: So you want to go?

Me: No! (I should have just kept with to the “no”.)

Him: So you don’t want to go?

Me: No. (Although technically ‘yes’ would probably be the proper way of declining at this point, but it would end up having the wrong effect. )

Obviously our conversations are not always like this, just mostly when I’m tired, hangry (hungry and angry) or for some reason showing my very Finnish side. (Usually I’m the one that won’t shut up, I do have a lot to say… which might not come as a surprise to you. 😂)

I am not saying that either way is right nor wrong. They are just different. And of course Finns are aware and don’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings on purpose. So to my new peeps in Texas – I probably won’t sugarcoat things for you. I’ll be upfront and honest about my opinions (which I tend to have in quite a big quantity, lol). Just bare with me.

And btw, if you have something to tell me, please, don’t be afraid to speak your my mind. Approach me and let me know. Don’t beat around the bush. 😉

CC

P.S. This is also one of those posts that I had started writing in 2016. Funny how it still is relevant. I guess I haven’t changed that much. 😂